Trying new things.
STEPPING OUT of my comfort zone.
Like driving downtown.
Sitting ALONE on a patio.
WRITING a blog.
Or, like going from stay-at-home-wife-and-mom to
getting my own place,
starting my own business,
It’s doing LIFE ON MY OWN after years of doing life together with someone else. It’s discovering who I am and WHAT I AM MADE OF, and knowing without flinching that I solemnly refuse to settle for anything less from myself than AUTHENTICITY. Period.
Being brave alone means coming to terms with the fact that I AM MY OWN soft place to land. It’s looking mistakes, failure, defeat, and criticism straight in the eye. And, it’s accepting that if I am going to overcome those things, then sometimes I will have to SUCK IT UP and be my own cheerleader.
It’s being bold enough to BELIEVE IN MYSELF- by myself.
My Pastor, Jesse Shook, says,
“Boldness is behavior born out of belief.”
For me being brave is learning –
The difference between inspiration and exasperation: DETERMINATION.
I have determined today to be my own cheerleader. I am depending on me. And, so are the two most amazing people I have ever known in my life – my children. So, with MY FACE SET LIKE FLINT…I baked cookies (my own soft place to land). And, I got all retro: I turned up Gloria Gaynor and found something inside myself:
GUMPTION, BABY! WHO KNEW?
CRANK IT UP!!! But, please note that this song is NOT in any conceivable way aimed at anyone. No hidden meaning here, folks. So, move on. For me, this song is NOT about someone else – it is about ME looking defeat square in the eye and MAKING MYSELF STRONG!!! And, it was a huge resource to me today in an effort to suck it up and BE MY OWN CHEERLEADER, so I cranked it up and sang it loud…at least a dozen times!
Finally, what began last week as a little seed of bravery from the patio at Brownstone on 7th Street has grown all week into DETERMINATION, BOLDNESS, BELIEVING! And, no other word describes what has grown in my heart this week better than this one. So, I leave you with this (from my brand-new dictionary, which I am unapologetically SMITTEN with):